Placement Coinologies

First of all, coinology is a word that has been coined by GMan. And it means the same thing too.

Now that is clear, let us explain the settings. After a very relaxing holidays during which Yours Truly gave a new definition to joblessness, college had a rude shock awaiting me. It seemed that the placement procedure of which we had been hearing about for the last three years was finally going to strike our shores. Thanks to my imba preparations during the holidays, I was caught as unprepared as the Grasshopper caught by the winter. The only preparations were regarding the costume, rather fancy dress that one had to wear for the ceremony. Thanks to my parents, who had high hopes regarding my being placed somewhere, I had a decent wardrobe with all accessories included. My dad even wanted to buy me a tie, but I somehow managed to convey that I already was looking like a nitwit with my black shoes and tucked-in shirt with full sleeves. Thus in that respect and that respect alone, I was prepared.

Then regarding the three years of studies which I had studiously neglected, I found out that I wasn't even aware of the textbooks needed. Thus began a frantic preparation procedure, and anyone would have been surprised to find Damu who is usually never found in his room even during exam time, religiously waking up early and slogging away at a huge mountain of studies. Soon D-Day arrived, or did it? No, because GE which was slated to be the first company ready to take the risk of recruiting us decided to snub us in the face. Halfway through their PPT, we were told that they didn't give a rat's ass about BTechs and asked us to shove off. Well we consoled ourselves that we had a proper dress rehearsal (literally as well as figuratively). Then the other companies started arriving, and after a quicky aborted attempt at studying programming, I decided to take only core companies seriously. That was easier said than done, as I was somewhere in the 30-40 range of GPAs. And even now I am in search of a job. Is there any core company out there which recruits a person who likes English, reading novels, crossword, knows nothing (as of now) about electronics but is willing to learn anything??? Then search no further I am right here.

Signing off with some mathematical coinologies that have been developed considering the placement season.

Damu Distance - The Damu Distance of a person is defined as the number of pre-placement talks he/she has attended.
D(I) = Summation ( Pre placement talks of all companies)
[I is a random variable denoting an individual]

SPrem* Count - A mathematical extension of Damu Distance, it is the number of placement tests that a person has cleared. This has been coined after a legendary character who is rumoured to have cleared so many tests that the guy who guards the Placement department is on first name terms with him.

Toodles


*Not a typo